Ch9:
Fatty - funny bastard who will always put a smile on your face (you have to laugh at just how dated his attitudes have become too)
Gus - the undisputed king of reading the game as a whole, momentum shifts, and player emotion
(These two together are so good at delivering all-round atmosphere for big games.)
Also, Sterlo & Slater - technically astute, insightful, and unbiased. Very good at breaking down the mechanics of the game
Honourable mention to Thaiday., plus Ruan Sims actually seems to have something to say occasionally (unlike Alana Ferguson)
Wally, Lockyer, Thurston are terrible at the English language, and along with Joey, Freddy, and Cam, offer nothing. (Don't mind a bit of Gal occasionally)
Fox:
Matty Johns - Legend (shame he's not also in commentary)
Brandy - technically astute, insightful, and unbiased (definitely the best on Fox)
Ennis - tries too hard
Anasta & Blocker - morons
Cronk - douchebag of the highest order
Loz goes alright.
Ch9 ex-player commentary team take the cake