Today's humour - New anti-terrorism laws: Aussie Citizenship Questionairre * How many slabs can you fit in the back of a Falcon Ute while also allowing room for your cattle dog? * When packing an Esky do you put the ice or the beer in first? * Is the traditional Aussie Christmas dinner: a) At least two roasted meats with roast vegetables, followed by a pudding you could use as a cannonball. Also ham. In 40C heat. b) A seafood buffet followed by a barbie, with rather a lot of booze and ham. In 40C heat. c) Both of the above, one at lunchtime and one at dinnertime. Weather continues fine. * How many beers in a slab? * Does "yeah-nah" mean "Yes and no" or "Maybe" or "Yes I understand but No I don't agree"? * The phrases "strewth" and "flamin' dingo" can be attributed to which TV character? a) Toadie from Neighbours b) Alf from Home & Away c) Agro from Agro's Cartoon Connection d) Sgt. Tom Croydon from Blue Heelers? * When cooking a barbecue do you turn the sausages a) Once or twice b) As often as necessary to cook c) After each stubby d) Until charcoal? * Name three of the Daddo brothers. * Who was the original lead singer of AC/DC? * Which option describes your ideal summer afternoon: a) Drinking beer a mate's place b) Drinking beer at the beach c) Drinking beer watching the cricket/footy d) Drinking beer at a mate's place while watching the cricket before going to the beach? * Would you eat pineapple on pizza? Would you eat egg on a pizza? * How many cans of beer did David Boon consume on a plane trip from Australia to England? * How many stubbies is it from Brissy to the Gold Coast in a Torana travelling at 120km/h? * Who are Scott and Charlene? * How do you apply your tomato sauce to a pie? a) Squirt and spread with finger b) Sauce injection straight into the middle? * If the police raided your home would you: a) Allow them to rummage through your personal items b) Phone up the nearest talkback radio shock jock and complain c) Put a written complaint in to John Howard and hope that he answers it personally? * Which Australian Prime Minister held the world record for drinking a yardie full of beer the fastest? * Have you ever had/do you have a mullet? * Thongs are: a) Skimpy underwear b) Casual footwear c) They're called jandals, bro? d)Japanese Safety Boots * On which Ashes tour did Warney's hair look the best? 1993, 1997, 2001 or 2005? * What someone is more likely to die of? a) Red Back Spider b) Great White Shark c) Victorian Police Officer d) King Brown Snake e) Your missus after a big night f) Dropbear? * How many times must a steak be turned on a conventional four-burner barbie? * Can you sing along to Cold Chisel's Khe Sahn? * Explain both the "follow-on" and "LBW" rules in cricket and discuss the pros and cons for the third umpire decisions in the latter.... * Name at least 5 items that must be taken to a BBQ. * Who is current Australian test cricket captain: a) Ricky Ponting b) Don Bradman c) John Howard d) Makybe Diva? * Is it best to take a sick day: a) When the cricket's on b) When the cricket's on c) When the cricket's on * What animal is on the Bundaberg Rum bottle? * What is the difference between a pot and a middy of beer? * What are Budgie smugglers? * Did you cry when Molly died on a Country Practice? * A "Hoppoate" is: a) A breed of kangaroo b) A kind of Australian "wedgie" c) A disgraced Rugby League player? * What does having a 'chunder' mean? * When you were young did you prefer the Hills Hoist over any swing set? * What do the following terms mean: a) Mate? b) Maate c) Maaaaaaate? * Best Aussie name is what? a) Cheryl b) Charlene c) Bazza d) Thommo e) Shazza * What does the terminology 'True Blue' mean?