Ray Hadley - Josh Massoud blue

[Las Vegas Blvd]

Look her family is from there mine down here at least she is talking in mindset to get back together but I am very cautious after being burnt quite heavily. Counselling works as long as both parties are open to trying to fix it, I went to interelate half dozen times and she was too busy wanted me to go and so on.

You can pm me mate if you like

 

[winnyason]

Thanks bud.

 

[globaleagle]

Reading your story breaks my heart Winnayson . 🙁 Unfortunately lots of aussie blokes are going or have been through what you are now facing .


Am wondering if anyone here has gone to marriage counselling , and if so does it help ?

Well, it gives the woman yet one more person to complain too about you.




#probablyinappropriate
#sorry

 

[ALinda]

to use the kids also as another excuse as to why he doesn't want this played publicly?? Please, it's all about Ray with Ray.

He perceives he's been wronged, and heaven help anyone who has wronged the great Ray.

Exactly, me thinks you're spot on @Killer03!

---

No bud she won't go to counselling, but she wants me to move coffs to buy another house and support her we can just afford the mess she has created here. Have a rented out house and massive overheads she left job is not working a income of 60 k is pretty big in regional Australia, I am at a loss where her head is. We barely have 100 dollars when mortgage is taken and that is with renters paying that side of it.
What happens to woman when they have children? They have rights to do whatever they want with people's lives.

Being a female, dare I answer this but I do feel for you @winnyason.

I can only say at least our beloved team's on top and hopefully they stay there so you can enjoy the ride and give you some cheer. All the best!

 

[simon64]

I have through it myself with little kids now been apart 5 months terrible. Kids live in coffs with her I live in orange. 15 years together, it is the worse things blokes will ever go through.

Hang in there @winnyason . My ex and I separated over 5 years ago and i've had some pretty low times over that period but it does get better. It really sucks when the kids get brought into it all. I haven't had contact with my 17yo son for quite some time due to his mum getting in his ear but luckily have 3 others who do 🙂

Know exactly how you feel boys. My ex did the same to our son who last spoke to me 7 years ago. To say its gut wrenching is understating it but that's life.

All we can do is not stoop to that level and hope it works out. Personally, I don't hold out much hope.

 

[Normie]

Am wondering if anyone here has gone to mariage councelling , and if so does it help ?

I went to marriage counseling with my ex a number of times but it didn't do any good. She wasn't that truthful during the sessions plus it didn't help that the counselor seemed to take her side and was the 1 to suggest that we separate.
I have had other friend's who swear by it and believe that all couples should do it sooner rather than later......

 

[globaleagle]

I went to marriage counseling with my ex a number of times but it didn't do any good. She wasn't that truthful during the sessions plus it didn't help that the counsellor seemed to take her side and was the 1 to suggest that we separate.
I have had other friend's who swear by it and believe that all couples should do it sooner rather than later......

Are you sure you didn't get tricked into going to one of her friends disguised as a counsellor?

Not sure taking sides and suggesting to separate is what they're supposed to do!

 

[Frank]

I wasn't initially going to weigh in on the marriage split debate but having gone through this myself 12 years ago i thought I could offer some advice.

Marriage counselling? The idea of it never appealed to me. I figure that most times you arrive at that point it is already too late. I'm not saying it won't work for others. Just not for me.

My situation was a little different to others described here. I had an inkling my ex was going splitsville. Little things like money going missing. Unplanned trips away to visit family etc. I had a little time to position myself for the inevitable.

When the time came I was determined to keep the kids. She was heading up to QLD. She was surprised that I wasn't surprised! I told her I wouldn't stand in her way so long as the kids stayed with me in the home they had grown up in. Mind you the kids were only 12, 10, and 3 at the time. She didn't put up much of a fight and was gone within a week.

I used to get people sympathising with me about how difficult it must be for a single father working full time raising three young children. It used to turn my stomach listening to that sh*t. It mostly came from other women. I never found it that hard and it certainly was never a burden to me. I used to ridicule women who say how hard it is to raise kids, keep house, and work at the same time. They usually stopped arguing when they discovered my position. If you love your family it just isn't hard - simple.

I'd hate to think where my kids would have ended up had I not insisted on keeping them with me. As it stands my eldest is now a teacher at a local primary school. Her younger sister will also be graduating from uni this year. While my youngest, a boy, is in Year 10. I doubt he'll reach the same academic levels of his sisters but is an awesome kid nonetheless.

My advice to anyone going through separation/divorce is this. You need to make the following call as early as possible. I know it is hard but all emotion needs to be removed from making this call. You may think reconciliation is a possibility but when making this call you are planning for the possibility that it isn't. My final warning is that delaying this call can make your life miserable beyond the time when you are finally over the split. The call is agree on a PROPERTY SETTLEMENT. Don't wait . DO IT NOW.

Most people think that property settlements apply from when they split. Or at worse, from when they divorce. Not so! A property settlement applies to when the settlement is agreed upon. It took about 4 years before my ex and I to officially divorce. In that time a property boom had occurred and my superannuation had done extremely well from a sustained stock market surge. She was entitled to a fair chunk of that. I was horrified. She was claiming huge amount without any real regard for her kids and their welfare. I dodged a bullet because, out of the blue, she settled for a much smaller, quicker, settlement as she was planning to leave her new husband! In the end we settled amicably.

My point is that it could have been much, much worse for me and the kids. There was the real possibility we would have to sell the family home. The value of the house more than doubled in the four years since we separated. The stock market had soared and so did my super along with it. I'm talking the period between 2002 and 2006. Don't wait, make the call early. If your separation is looking permanent then agree on a settlement. You don't even need to be separated to make a property settlement. Many happily married couples have them in place. It is much harder to do whilst you are devastated by a marriage split. It can be a very emotional time. See a solicitor and get it sorted. You don't even need a solicitor if the settlement is agreed by both parties.

This isn't a popular topic. Particularly for anyone going through the emotional minefield of separation/divorce. But believe me when I tell you that it can be the most important component - especially if there are significant assets involved. Long after you are over the marriage split the financial settlement can cause you a sh*tload of grief. And believe me. You WILL get over the break-up. It may take a lot longer to get over the financial hit if you wait.

The lessons I learned from my marriage break-up are these;

1) First and foremost are the kids. Decide who is best to raise them and then fight like hell if you think it is you.

2) Make an early call on a property settlement.

---

Fark! That's a long post.

 

[shawn.b]

I'm with you @Frank

Working through my property settlement now after 5 years & it isn't easy.

 

[manlyfan76]

Thanks mate, support is awesome. dads certainly get forgotten about i this instance. i still have daily contact with kids by phone, but not the same.

Reading your story breaks my heart Winnayson . 🙁 Unfortunately lots of aussie blokes are going or have been through what you are now facing .
Am wondering if anyone here has gone to mariage councelling , and if so does it help ?

Counseling can help no doubt but there is a lot of different types of counseling, and some councilors are much much better than others. If you go early enough then you can really turn the direction your relationship was heading around.
There is a book by Sue Johnson, "Hold me tight -7 conversations for a lifetime of Love - "
Her methods are very good and if you can find a Councilor who is familiar with her techniques then please take the plunge. You can also search for her on youtube to get an idea.

 

[Las Vegas Blvd]

Thanks mate, support is awesome. dads certainly get forgotten about i this instance. i still have daily contact with kids by phone, but not the same.

Reading your story breaks my heart Winnayson . 🙁 Unfortunately lots of aussie blokes are going or have been through what you are now facing .
Am wondering if anyone here has gone to mariage councelling , and if so does it help ?

Counseling can help no doubt but there is a lot of different types of counseling, and some councilors are much much better than others. If you go early enough then you can really turn the direction your relationship was heading around.
There is a book by Sue Johnson, "Hold me tight -7 conversations for a lifetime of Love - "
Her methods are very good and if you can find a Councilor who is familiar with her techniques then please take the plunge. You can also search for her on youtube to get an idea.

My mate and his now ex partner attended a councelling session , she ran out in tears after 5 minutes - but he still had to cough up the 90buck fee . No great loss really - she was a roosters supporter

 

[simon64]

Thanks mate, support is awesome. dads certainly get forgotten about i this instance. i still have daily contact with kids by phone, but not the same.

Reading your story breaks my heart Winnayson . 🙁 Unfortunately lots of aussie blokes are going or have been through what you are now facing .
Am wondering if anyone here has gone to mariage councelling , and if so does it help ?

Counseling can help no doubt but there is a lot of different types of counseling, and some councilors are much much better than others. If you go early enough then you can really turn the direction your relationship was heading around.
There is a book by Sue Johnson, "Hold me tight -7 conversations for a lifetime of Love - "
Her methods are very good and if you can find a Councilor who is familiar with her techniques then please take the plunge. You can also search for her on youtube to get an idea.

Counseling is a great idea.....if both parties are actually trying to resolve whatever issues there may be.

In my case, the ex had no intention of trying to resolve anything. She just wanted me to abandon my kids and walk away.

 

[Las Vegas Blvd]

Thanks mate, support is awesome. dads certainly get forgotten about i this instance. i still have daily contact with kids by phone, but not the same.

Reading your story breaks my heart Winnayson . 🙁 Unfortunately lots of aussie blokes are going or have been through what you are now facing .
Am wondering if anyone here has gone to mariage councelling , and if so does it help ?

Counseling can help no doubt but there is a lot of different types of counseling, and some councilors are much much better than others. If you go early enough then you can really turn the direction your relationship was heading around.
There is a book by Sue Johnson, "Hold me tight -7 conversations for a lifetime of Love - "
Her methods are very good and if you can find a Councilor who is familiar with her techniques then please take the plunge. You can also search for her on youtube to get an idea.

Counseling is a great idea.....if both parties are actually trying to resolve whatever issues there may be.

In my case, the ex had no intention of trying to resolve anything. She just wanted me to abandon my kids and walk away.

...that plus a house and car plus a life time of child support 🙂

 

[Chip and Chase]

The hypocrite is at it again. Doesn't like having his personal life probed but OK to do it to others.

http://www.smh.com.au/entertainment/tv-and-radio/ray-hadley-storms-out-of-karl-stefanovic-interview-on-today-show-20140715-zt7h7.html

 

[double hoops]

Hadley must have won at least one bitch fight in his life. Must have been the only way he got a job commentating the footy. He and voice are simply an embarrassment to the game.