As per
@Woodsie 's instructions...
Playing in one of my last games of footy, Gold Coast Grp 18 comp for Seagulls against Nerang or Runaway Bay: one of the teams that had massive Kiwi props anyway lol.. We'd had an ordinary season, and in this particular game were holding on by our finger nails in a wet horrible contest. It was an absolute game of attrition with players hurt everywhere but gutting it out..
It was also a messy game with a lot of dropped ball, and as a result, a lot of scrums... After packing into what felt like the thousandth bloody scrum, we've lost it against the feed and they've made one play and dropped it, with both forward packs ambling across the field muttering about the backs and their sh*thouse handling... When a winger named "Eddie the Eagle" chimed in...
"COME ON FORWARDS, WORK HARDER YOU LAZY BASTARDS"!!!
This was pretty late in the first half, we are all covered in mud and blood and crap, exhausted from slugging it out in horrible conditions and old mate Eddie is pristine: just a bit damp from from prancing up and down the sideline... Obviously we are a little dark about his "work harder" suggestion so we pack into the scrum and as we clash I grab my opposite number (about 130kgs of annoyed kiwi) and tell him "3rd ruck and that goose will be off my left shoulder"... The big kiwi blinks...and grins a horrible nasty grin...
So we win the scrum, and I've screamed out "me, 3", and then "Eagle, left hip"!! As I was known to pop the odd good ball out Eagle has then lined himself up as I've taken the hit up, carefully putting the big kiwi just inside...
I've hit the line, half broken it and popped a little gem of a ball on Eagle's chest, and in his mind he's off and running... Except 130kgs of kiwi "read" it beautifully and just nailed him. To this day I don't think he's recovered from that hit, it was a bone rattler of EPIC proportions... Old mate Eagle spent a few minutes twitching on the ground before wobbling off to the wing and quietly staggering up and down the wing for the rest of the game..
The big kiwi...wel he looked at me, winked, grinned a little and bought me a beer after the game...