Tuesday funny

  • We had an issue with background services between march 10th and 15th or there about. This meant the payment services were not linking to automatic upgrades. If you paid for premium membership and are still seeing ads please let me know and the email you used against PayPal and I cam manually verify and upgrade your account.

PJ

Bencher
Dave works hard at the plant and spends two nights each week bowling and

Plays golf every Saturday. His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.

The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Dave!
How ya doin?"

His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh no," says Dave. "He's on my bowling team."

When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,

"How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"

"I recognize her, she's the waitress from the golf club. I always have a bud at the end of the 1st nine, honey".

A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, starts to rub herself all over him and says, "Hi Davey, want your usual table dance, big boy?"

Dave's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.

Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. Dave tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.

She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every 4 letter word in the book.
The cabby turns around and says, "Geez Dave, you picked up a real bitch this time."
 
Dave works hard at the plant and spends two nights each week bowling and

Plays golf every Saturday. His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says, \"Hey, Dave!
How ya doin?\"

His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. \"Oh no,\" says Dave. \"He's on my bowling team.\"

When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,

\"How did she know that you drink Budweiser?\"

\"I recognize her, she's the waitress from the golf club. I always have a bud at the end of the 1st nine, honey\".

A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, starts to rub herself all over him and says, \"Hi Davey, want your usual table dance, big boy?\"

Dave's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.

Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. Dave tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.

She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every 4 letter word in the book.
The cabby turns around and says, \"Geez Dave, you picked up a real bitch this time.\"
For me , thats the punchline.
 
ha- an ex misses of mine wanted me to take her to a strip joint once so I took her to a half classy one called Dancers on Bayswater Rd in the Cross.
She turns out be-friending one of the strippers and the stripper sat down and gave us her hard luck story (instead of stripping like I personally would have preferred her to do). It was easter and she told us she didnt get any easter eggs (boo farken whoo- neither did I)...so then upon leaving the strip joint my pissed girlfriend decided we should head down to Coles and buy her a basket of eggs (yes a big basket). Now I had to go along with all this or else it would've been nada sex for me that night but it was extremely embarrassing.
We went back and asked for the stripper at the front desk. When the misses gave her the basket of eggs she cried....farken weird situation.
 
ha- an ex misses of mine wanted me to take her to a strip joint once so I took her to a half classy one called Dancers on Bayswater Rd in the Cross.
She turns out be-friending one of the strippers and the stripper sat down and gave us her hard luck story (instead of stripping like I personally would have preferred her to do). It was easter and she told us she didnt get any easter eggs (boo farken whoo- neither did I)...so then upon leaving the strip joint my pissed girlfriend decided we should head down to Coles and buy her a basket of eggs (yes a big basket). Now I had to go along with all this or else it would've been nada sex for me that night but it was extremely embarrassing.
We went back and asked for the stripper at the front desk. When the misses gave her the basket of eggs she cried....farken weird situation.
What , she couldnt strip and talk at the same time.
 
no she was invited to sit with us and have a drink by my girlfriend...she had finished her strip
 
ha- an ex misses of mine wanted me to take her to a strip joint once so I took her to a half classy one called Dancers on Bayswater Rd in the Cross.
She turns out be-friending one of the strippers and the stripper sat down and gave us her hard luck story (instead of stripping like I personally would have preferred her to do). It was easter and she told us she didnt get any easter eggs (boo farken whoo- neither did I)...so then upon leaving the strip joint my pissed girlfriend decided we should head down to Coles and buy her a basket of eggs (yes a big basket). Now I had to go along with all this or else it would've been nada sex for me that night but it was extremely embarrassing.
We went back and asked for the stripper at the front desk. When the misses gave her the basket of eggs she cried....farken weird situation.

Now if only the stripper had then gone home with you and you smeared easter eggs over both girls and proceeded to lick it off and then .........

But I digress
 
[quote author=PJ]
ha- an ex misses of mine wanted me to take her to a strip joint once so I took her to a half classy one called Dancers on Bayswater Rd in the Cross.
She turns out be-friending one of the strippers and the stripper sat down and gave us her hard luck story (instead of stripping like I personally would have preferred her to do). It was easter and she told us she didnt get any easter eggs (boo farken whoo- neither did I)...so then upon leaving the strip joint my pissed girlfriend decided we should head down to Coles and buy her a basket of eggs (yes a big basket). Now I had to go along with all this or else it would've been nada sex for me that night but it was extremely embarrassing.
We went back and asked for the stripper at the front desk. When the misses gave her the basket of eggs she cried....farken weird situation.

Now if only the stripper had then gone home with you and you smeared easter eggs over both girls and proceeded to lick it off and then .........

But I digress

[/quote]

ha...well that is something I would've been just fine with and after the misses made comment about how hot the stripper was earlier on it was suggested by myself believe me...unfortunately the misses wasnt amused so I turned the comment into a joke- she wasn't the most adventurous person - I was shocked enough when she asked to go there.
 
Now if only the stripper had then gone home with you and you smeared easter eggs over both girls and proceeded to lick it off and then .........

I recognise that writing style...............................from the forum letters section of a 1980's penthouse magazine !

Or so a perverted friend once told me.....but i digress ! :p
 
hahahhahha good joke

And funny story PJ

A couple of mates and i went to a strip joint once.. we got sat right in front of the stage and she went to my mate sitting 2 to the left of me and sat in front of him and went to put her leg over his head so his head was between her legs and she accidently kicked him in the head and knocked him out!!!

hahahah fark that was funny
 
PJ I cant believe she was your girlfriend after that. Should have kicked her in the gina and told her where to go
 
PJ I cant believe she was your girlfriend after that. Should have kicked her in the gina and told her where to go

Dont know who Gina is but in any case i would have kicked her fair up the c*nt instead. ;)
 
[quote author=Daniel]
PJ I cant believe she was your girlfriend after that. Should have kicked her in the gina and told her where to go

Dont know who Gina is but in any case i would have kicked her fair up the c*nt instead. ;)

[/quote]
[br][img=30x18]../../AE_files/public/1163560485_689_FT137322_rofl1.gif[/img]
 

Latest posts

Team P W L PD Pts
3 3 0 48 6
3 2 1 45 4
3 2 1 28 4
3 2 1 22 4
3 2 1 15 4
3 2 1 14 4
2 1 1 13 4
3 2 1 10 4
2 1 1 6 4
3 2 1 -3 4
3 1 2 0 2
3 1 2 -5 2
3 1 2 -15 2
3 1 2 -22 2
3 1 2 -36 2
2 0 2 -56 2
3 0 3 -64 0
Back
Top Bottom