Happy losers

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court83

Bencher
I was wondering if this smiling and laughing after every loss is a generational thing.. If so, we may aswell get used to it now...

It drives me nuts to see manly so happy and jovial after each loss, but then I take the step kid (11yr old) to soccer each Saturday, and at the end of each game, he can't even tell me who won... No one keeps score (bar a few parents), no one cares about winning or losing, and next week they will all get a trophy.. It does my head in to the point I asked the missus why we should bother paying for him to play next year...

Now, I'm not some old grouch, I'm 35.. I played footy as a kid for narabeen sharks ( and beresfield bears in Newcastle when we moved) and I was absolutely gutted after each loss... We won the comp when I Was 6 at the sharks and I still have that medal, because we earned it.. Not everyone got one..

I cant understand why parents for the most part don't have a problem with this.. Sure, sports fun and healthy, but Imo a big part of it is the competitive side and the feeling of achievement when your side wins awards..

In ten years time these snowflakes will be playing nrl, and I recon what we're seeing now Is only going to get worse unfortunately
 
I was wondering if this smiling and laughing after every loss is a generational thing.. If so, we may aswell get used to it now...

It drives me nuts to see manly so happy and jovial after each loss, but then I take the step kid (11yr old) to soccer each Saturday, and at the end of each game, he can't even tell me who won... No one keeps score (bar a few parents), no one cares about winning or losing, and next week they will all get a trophy.. It does my head in to the point I asked the missus why we should bother paying for him to play next year...

Now, I'm not some old grouch, I'm 35.. I played footy as a kid for narabeen sharks ( and beresfield bears in Newcastle when we moved) and I was absolutely gutted after each loss... We won the comp when I Was 6 at the sharks and I still have that medal, because we earned it.. Not everyone got one..

I cant understand why parents for the most part don't have a problem with this.. Sure, sports fun and healthy, but Imo a big part of it is the competitive side and the feeling of achievement when your side wins awards..

In ten years time these snowflakes will be playing nrl, and I recon what we're seeing now Is only going to get worse unfortunately

Junior sport is going that way, and you may well be right.

But look at Jurbo or Thommo after a loss, it doesn’t change how they think!!
 
Junior sport is going that way, and you may well be right.

But look at Jurbo or Thommo after a loss, it doesn’t change how they think!!
Yes, there will always be a few with that competitive fire, and I hope they are The ones that make it, but there's ALOT of players in nrl, and when ur brought up in the "no body loses, everyone's a winner, everyone gets an award" environment, I'm gonna say it will have to have some impact going forward
 
It drives me nuts to see manly so happy and jovial after each loss, but then I take the step kid (11yr old) to soccer each Saturday, and at the end of each game, he can't even tell me who won... No one keeps score (bar a few parents), no one cares about winning or losing, and next week they will all get a trophy.. It does my head in to the point I asked the missus why we should bother paying for him to play next year...

Er, if your ELEVEN year old step son is enjoying himself and is outside and not inside playing computer games all day.... I kinda think that's 2 good reasons right there.



You old grouch!
 
This is a very trivial point with massive variation in opinion.
Personally been involved in various sports for over 40 years and among that, coaching of juniors from 7's through to 16's.
I can honestly say in footy, the kids are always celebrating a win even at 6's level and in a close game at H/T coming up asking "who's winning" ?
2 key things about sport are teaching the kids how to win withing themselves and learn to be gracious in both winning and losing, the bad sportsmanship is just as important as learning to compete.
As a kid I took losses terribly, but a wise coach who was involved at the highest level once made a point I carried since that day - the biggest competition is playing to the best of your own ability and the results will take care of themselves...you should only feel down if you let yourself down.
The 2nd point from that same wise man was to never belittle your team mates - a good player can change a game, but a great player will lift his team mates and make them better players.
This is what I have taken on since that day and feel if you give your all - forget the scoreboard - that's a win.....part of me still hurts, but inside it can be used as inspiration to find that bit more next game.
The smiling stuff is not a great look but I can assure everyone, this does not change the feeling for the player or mean they don't care, well in most cases...especially the 18's and up.
That bloke with a smile can be hurting more than the bloke pulling a sad face and stomping around....I have seen many in a change room after the game hitting lockers and kicking bins and it can look just as stupid, especially when they were missing in the heat of battle.
The emotion of being a fan after seeing a loss can make it annoying to watch, but when the smoke clears, these players are likely hurting far more than fans presume.
 
"Growth Mindset" in sport: http://www.warriormindcoach.com/blog/2015/09/09/growth-mindset-sports-performance/

Proliferation of sports psychologists in the NRL has changed the way most players respond to "failure".

Think of it this way - when a rookie has a shocking first half, how do you want them to respond in the second? If they have a **** game this week, how do you want them to respond next week (+in training?). **** year, how should they respond next year? Having a sook achieves nothing.

Very big in progressive corporates. A concept that is hard to grasp for many of the old school where there are only two possible outcomes: success or failure.
 
"Growth Mindset" in sport: http://www.warriormindcoach.com/blog/2015/09/09/growth-mindset-sports-performance/

Proliferation of sports psychologists in the NRL has changed the way most players respond to "failure".

Think of it this way - when a rookie has a shocking first half, how do you want them to respond in the second? If they have a **** game this week, how do you want them to respond next week (+in training?). **** year, how should they respond next year? Having a sook achieves nothing.

Very big in progressive corporates. A concept that is hard to grasp for many of the old school where there are only two possible outcomes: success or failure.


To add - you need the drive to compete and win. In the event you dont win, the quicker you accept it, learn from it and get back to work, the better.
 
For what it is worth I have been coaching football (soccer) for around 25 years....and mainly at the lower end of the skill scale - basically the kids who get forgotten about and end up in the lower grades.

My job is to teach them skills and a passion for the game. Despite their relative lack of skill I can say that the team i am coaching this year attempts to play with more skill than almost any team they have come up against (basically they try to pass all the time even when it is a risk of conceding goals)

As an example we played against a team a few weeks ago that was set up to win. They had almost every player behind the ball and were lumping the ball forward to one quick player. Out of the 100 times they tried this it worked twice and they won 2-1.

Most of their team spent little or no time on the ball - the coach was yelling at them to "kick it" the whole match. My guys came off the park happy as they had plenty of time on the ball, lots of touches and understood that they "won" as we played better football which sets them up for the future.

Considering the very small % of kids who "make it" in every code I would rather my son and daughter watch people who seem to enjoy the game.
 
I always admired Beaver in regards to this topic. I would say Steve Menzies was one of the most competitive players, but no matter if his side won, lost or drew...he would smile and shake hands and have a laugh about things that happened in the game with mates on the other team. The fact is that after a game, you are still mates with a lot of the opposition. A lot of these blokes have known each other since schoolboy footy.

Beaver actually attributed his longevity in the game to being able to switch off straight after the fulltime whistle.

Side note; Good on all of you guys for putting in the time and effort to help out with kids in sport. I think that's awesome! :thumbsup:
 
When Jake was walking off in tears a few weeks ago, I thought to myself, there is passion. There is the MAN that should be captain of our team.

Barrett is just as passionate.
 
Cute true story.
School sports carnival this year. The 5 year-old Preppies run their race as full throttle as 5-year-olds can. About 10 seconds after all the other kids finish this little competitor with down syndrome crosses this line, throws her arms up in the air and shouts, "I'm a champion!"
She nailed sports psychology.
 
Yes, there will always be a few with that competitive fire, and I hope they are The ones that make it, but there's ALOT of players in nrl, and when ur brought up in the "no body loses, everyone's a winner, everyone gets an award" environment, I'm gonna say it will have to have some impact going forward
I disagree. I don’t think that’s the problem at all. Everybody still has a competitive fire. I think the problem is that relations between players from different teams have never been closer. There is no loyalty by clubs and players change clubs so easily. No addition lots of them play in junior teams together. The area you grow up in is often not the team you get your first crack in.

This globalization of footy!!. You bash each on the field but after the game you have a chat because you might be playing against players that are your friends.
 
"Growth Mindset" in sport: http://www.warriormindcoach.com/blog/2015/09/09/growth-mindset-sports-performance/

Proliferation of sports psychologists in the NRL has changed the way most players respond to "failure".

Think of it this way - when a rookie has a shocking first half, how do you want them to respond in the second? If they have a **** game this week, how do you want them to respond next week (+in training?). **** year, how should they respond next year? Having a sook achieves nothing.

Very big in progressive corporates. A concept that is hard to grasp for many of the old school where there are only two possible outcomes: success or failure.
It’s the exact same attitude that allows James Maloney to throw an intercept and five minutes later throw the exact same ball for a try regardless of pressure. You hear the old school commentators talk about it and it just baffles them. Nothing bothers him.

Meanwhile I think Jake gets too emotional. It hurts his game and I think makes teammates drop their heads too much
 
I grew up in Fressie ...... we hated those mongrel butt licking dickheads from Curlie ...... both sport and life were tribal ...

Today .... many of these Islander players played juniors together, are members of the same church, date each others sisters, play rep football together etc ..... before the game they may text each other after the game they may give it to each other ... Rugby League is just a big part of their extended social network for many ....

PSS ... Those Curlie punchies couldn't surf either ...
 
For what it is worth I have been coaching football (soccer) for around 25 years....and mainly at the lower end of the skill scale - basically the kids who get forgotten about and end up in the lower grades.

My job is to teach them skills and a passion for the game. Despite their relative lack of skill I can say that the team i am coaching this year attempts to play with more skill than almost any team they have come up against (basically they try to pass all the time even when it is a risk of conceding goals)

As an example we played against a team a few weeks ago that was set up to win. They had almost every player behind the ball and were lumping the ball forward to one quick player. Out of the 100 times they tried this it worked twice and they won 2-1.

Most of their team spent little or no time on the ball - the coach was yelling at them to "kick it" the whole match. My guys came off the park happy as they had plenty of time on the ball, lots of touches and understood that they "won" as we played better football which sets them up for the future.

Considering the very small % of kids who "make it" in every code I would rather my son and daughter watch people who seem to enjoy the game.

Can be a very rewarding gig ... I always liked the quote from that coach when asked by a player "can you make me a good player" the coach answered .. " I don't know. but I can make you a better player"

....For what it is worth, at the other end of the scale, the elite kids .... I was talking to this Yugoslavian skills coach who was saying that the Australian compulsion of trying to teach kids teamwork and to pass the ball from the age of 6 was counter-productive ...... he said that that kids at thatage just don't get it or want to get it ... and that it hinders their development ..

He said he never taught those things until the kids were 10/11 and understood the game and appreciated that teamwork would assist them in their own game .... until that age he wanted the hogs and the kids that tried to beat the whole team on their own ... he said these are the kids that learn the skills and go on to be the stars ..

an interesting and different perspective ...
..
 
Cute true story.
School sports carnival this year. The 5 year-old Preppies run their race as full throttle as 5-year-olds can. About 10 seconds after all the other kids finish this little competitor with down syndrome crosses this line, throws her arms up in the air and shouts, "I'm a champion!"
She nailed sports psychology.
Did you at least get a trophy?
@:p



Just kidding lolz
 
Can be a very rewarding gig ... I always liked the quote from that coach when asked by a player "can you make me a good player" the coach answered .. " I don't know. but I can make you a better player"

....For what it is worth, at the other end of the scale, the elite kids .... I was talking to this Yugoslavian skills coach who was saying that the Australian compulsion of trying to teach kids teamwork and to pass the ball from the age of 6 was counter-productive ...... he said that that kids at thatage just don't get it or want to get it ... and that it hinders their development ..

He said he never taught those things until the kids were 10/11 and understood the game and appreciated that teamwork would assist them in their own game .... until that age he wanted the hogs and the kids that tried to beat the whole team on their own ... he said these are the kids that learn the skills and go on to be the stars ..

an interesting and different perspective ...
..
Agree with him 100%

Early days are about skills until they can understand and play in a team
 
Team P W L PD Pts
3 3 0 48 6
4 3 1 28 6
3 2 1 10 6
4 2 2 39 4
3 2 1 28 4
3 2 1 15 4
3 2 1 14 4
2 1 1 13 4
2 1 1 6 4
3 2 1 -3 4
3 1 2 0 2
3 1 2 -5 2
3 1 2 -15 2
3 1 2 -22 2
3 1 2 -36 2
2 0 2 -56 2
3 0 3 -64 0
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