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Funnies -> chuk in your own

Discussion in 'General Discussion Forum' started by Dan, Dec 16, 2005.

  1. Dan

    Dan Kim Jong Dan Staff Member Administrator 2017 Tipping Competitor 2016 Tipping Competitor

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    How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?
    His hand caught fire.
     
  2. Dan

    Dan Kim Jong Dan Staff Member Administrator 2017 Tipping Competitor 2016 Tipping Competitor

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    What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
    A widow.
     
  3. clontaago

    clontaago Well-Known Member

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    Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
    A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
     
  4. The Fonz

    The Fonz Member

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    Why did timmy fall off the swing?
    Because of multiple bullet wounds to the chest.
     
  5. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    How do you get a women off during sex?
    Give her a shove!
     
  6. clontaago

    clontaago Well-Known Member

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    Nice one Fonz!
     
  7. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    A man is driving happily along when he is pulled over by the police. The copper approaches him and politely asks, "Have you been drinking, sir?"
    "Why?" snorts the man. "Is there a fat chick in my car?"
     
  8. Dan

    Dan Kim Jong Dan Staff Member Administrator 2017 Tipping Competitor 2016 Tipping Competitor

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    PJ nice and i like your train of thought!
     
  9. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    What do you call a fish with no eyes?
    A fsh
     
  10. Dan

    Dan Kim Jong Dan Staff Member Administrator 2017 Tipping Competitor 2016 Tipping Competitor

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    Because I am a man, there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about, especially while driving quietly. The answer is always either sex or football, though I have to make up something else when you ask, so don't.
     
  11. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    On a cold, cold night two bulls are standing in a field. One says "Boy it's mighty cold out here!", the other says "Yes, I think I might slip into a nice Jersey".
     
  12. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    If I had a rooster and you had a donkey and your donkey ate my rooster. What would you have?
    2 ft. of my cock in your ass.
     
  13. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    What's slimy cold long and smells like pork
    Kermit the frogs finger
     
  14. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    what is the difference between acne and a catholic priest?
    Acne usually comes on a boys face after he turns 12
     
  15. Dan

    Dan Kim Jong Dan Staff Member Administrator 2017 Tipping Competitor 2016 Tipping Competitor

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    there are 2 cows in a paddock. one of them raises its head and says
    "Mooooo"

    The other one turns to him and says
    "**** I was going to say that!"
     
  16. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    Two eggs boiling in a pan, one male and one female.
    The female egg says "Look, I've got a crack"
    "No good telling me" replies the male egg "I'm not hard yet"
     
  17. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    +49 /1
    Q. What do a gynocologist and a pizza boy have in common?
    A. They can smell it but they cant eat it!
     
  18. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

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    Q. What does a dwarf get if he runs through a womans legs ???......
    A. A clit around the ear and a flap across the face
     
  19. Nutzcraw

    Nutzcraw Active Member

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    Q. - what do you do when your missus is annoying ya while you watch the footy??

    A. - Take her back to the sink and shorten the chain!
     
  20. PJ

    PJ Well-Known Member

    Ratings:
    +49 /1
    Q. What's the last thing that goes through a fly's mind when it hits a windscreen?
    A. It's arse!
     

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