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Lightbulb Jokes

Discussion in 'General Discussion Forum' started by Berkeley_Eagle, Apr 6, 2009.

  1. Berkeley_Eagle

    Berkeley_Eagle Current Status: 24/7 Manly Fan 2016 Tipping Competitor

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    Q: How many circus performers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
    A: Four: One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go!

    or
    A: Four. One to change the bulb and three to sing, Ta da!


    Q: How many college football players does it take to change a light
    bulb?
    A: The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!

    Q: How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: None.... There never *was* any light bulb, don't you remember?

    Q: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: That's not funny!

    Q: How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: None. It turns itself in.

    Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: Three: One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation
    specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare.

    Q: How many Marxists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: None: The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.

    Q: How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: Seven: One to install the new bulb, and six to figure what to do with
    the old one for the next 10,000 years.

    Q: How many consultants does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: I'll have an estimate for you a week from Monday.

    Q: How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: One-third less than for a regular bulb.

    Q: How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: Two: One to screw it almost all the way in and the other to give it
    a surprising twist at the end.

    Q: How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself
    symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in
    a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a cosmos of
    nothingness.

    Q: How many Orthodox Rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: Change?
     
  2. Zep

    Zep Active Member

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    Q. How many software engineers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    A. None, it is a hardware problem.
     
  3. Dan

    Dan Administrator Staff Member Administrator 2016 Tipping Competitor

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    Q. How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A. 2, but I have no idea how they got in there
     
  4. The Gronk

    The Gronk Well-Known Member

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    Q: How many Manly players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    A: Doesn't matter because Shane Neumann already dropped it. 
     
  5. ManlyBacker

    ManlyBacker Winging it Staff Member

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    Harsh Gronk

    Q: How many NRL administrators does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    A: None - the lights just never go on, while the board argues that the clubs are best suited to do the job
     

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